Yes, I struggle... A lot

A wise friend of mine told me today, "it's ok to struggle." I have tried so hard to put on a brave face. I've felt like I've let everyone down by not being strong, by breaking down. Everyone is always telling me how strong I am and I want to be tgat for everyone. But I may look strong but I struggle. I cry myself to sleep, I cry in the shower, I cry in my car... I feel overwhelmed a lot. Not for lack of people to help me. I am extremely lucky with the amazing family support and help I get! I just have been dealing with so much. I have issues with Asher's bio dad. The other day was my last day in the army. I may not have done much in the last few months but I always knew that door was cracked. Now, it's slammed shut. It makes me feel completely useless. But here is the beauty of this all. And it came to me in a cliche moment, running into stormy clouds. This shall pass. I may be stuck in some dark clouds but I can see the sunlight on the other side!